Dealing With Jealous Friends

A young man with a promising career or an older man with success under his belt will inevitably run into that old demon, jealousy.


Often jealousy takes hold with even our best of friends or beloved family members but whenever it raises its head you had better be on your best defenses or it could turn into a tempest of disastrous results.

Jealousy is one of those emotional responses that destroys everything , even the person who expresses it. Some people just can't stand to see someone do well and they drop into a state of jealousy so powerful that it has detrimental results on themselves and others. In extreme cases it can lead to violence on extreme levels. The immature of us will fall into jealousy triggered by the most benign situations. If you don't have an eye out for it it can creep up on you and bite you badly.

Let's say you've gotten your first good job right out of college. Your buddies and classmates are still struggling. Some or most would congratulate you on your good fortune but there may be that one or two people who resent your rise and hold or express some jealousy. The manifestations of jealousy can range from a mere scowl to outright violence. Some people have no control over their emotional state and it doesn't matter their age, race, color, or creed. Jealousy is jealousy plain and simple. Here you're a young man on your way up the ladder and you've got someone in your sphere of life who secretly or overtly resents you. You need to look for the warning signs or you'll be in trouble.

Again, you're on your new job and there are other employees there. Things may start out fine with you meeting the staff and starting off on a good foot. Some day you solve a problem others were incompetent or negligent to solve and you get the hero's recognition. Sane people would congratulate you as you've added to the integrity and equity of the business. This is the optimum situation but in this world isn't always the case. One or more may be jealous and see you as a threat to their jobs. This is their imaginations going off the rails and normally management will be aware of this and put a stop to it, but if they don't it'll be up to you.

For the middle or upper exec the same applies. Save the day and you may incur some jealous rival. It's part of the zoo we live in. Some people will just not adjust themselves to avoid the pitfalls of jealousy.

Relationships are a big bowl of soup where jealousy can reside. You have a great girlfriend and the other guys or the girls who were after you, get jealous. As long as it's a healthy response it will go away but in some people it turns into a quagmire of seething hatred that only a good shock can cure. Relationships happen during school and in the business world. Not necessarily romantic relationships here but any bonding for whatever reason. Say you've suddenly found out your manager and yourself are fans of some obscure television show or sport. You both click and become pals. This may set off the other workers who haven't been able to bond with the manager on the same level. That should get you some cold stares at the least.

College or training school is where you're going to get those jealousy elves popping up their heads and taking pokes at you. You're getting good grades, you're moving ahead, the professor acknowledges you publicly, and you're shining like a new penny. Many or most of your classmates will be in awe and admiration of you but there's bound to be that one or two who harbor a jealous grudge. Watch out for them.

The way to keep a sharp eye out for jealousy is to keep aware. When people suddenly change their responses toward you, you'll know something is wrong. That one person in your department who was always friendly who now avoids you and cowers is definitely up to something or is the effect of the real jealous person who has bad mouthed you. That there applies to every situation even family. A man's welfare and peace of mind depends on how he handles other people and jealous people need to be either handled directly or left alone to stew in their own sauce.

Jealousy is a snake in your front lawn ready to bite. A real man knows how to mow the grass.